Elective Heart Surgery

Recently my Dad made the decision to have open heart surgery to repair multiple blockages he has endured for the past 20 years.  God has been graciously lenient as He has allowed my Dad free will to choose life with a defective, blocked heart rather than face the ominous unknown of open heart surgery. Truly God has protected his precious life awaiting Dad's "change of heart"

by vampiregirl66

My Dad could have chosen to live with his heart blockages for the rest of his days until a heart attack or stroke finally killed him,  crippled him or taken the choice out of his hands.  But, It became increasingly evident to Dad and to all of us that unless he had the surgery, he would likely not live out the year.   My Dad had to  face the fact that living with a serious heart blockage wasn't really living at all. 

My Dad's delayed heart surgery mimics the journey of faith many of us have been on... We can be content to  live a half life within our comfort zones. Stubbornly insisting we are FINE while the plaque of bitterness, pride, shame or fear slowly kills our joy and flatlines our faith.

I had lived years with a heart blockage of spiritual pride and a  judgmental spirit. Until my own daughter's face took the place of the faceless, nameless ones I had been unconsciously stoning from the comfort of my climate controlled pew.

When my daughter came out, God presented me with an opportunity for an elective heart surgery of my own.  Spiritual heart surgery.  I was afraid. I was way out of my comfort zone. I was bewildered and angry and  wasn't entirely sure I would survive the grief.  I put it off again and again, trying to figure it all out and "fix her"   But eventually I realized that the burden I carried for my precious one to "be straight" was like a heart blockage. I realized it would eventually kill my relationship with my precious daughter, kill my joy, my faith and eventually snuff out Kait's faith as well. This need to control and to fix my daughter had to be cut out. I am an incredibly poor substitute for the Holy Spirit!   I finally brought my own sins of spiritual pride and a judgmental spirit and checked in  to the throne room of my great Physician, Jesus.

He has relieved me of my burden, assuring me that He carries my beloved and he carries me.  He is Creator and He is in control. Not me.  He has not miraculously made my daughter straight but he, like a gifted surgeon, performed  the more urgent work and it happened to be on my own stubborn heart.  Jesus removed my heart of stone and replaced it with a heart of flesh.

I have been through some difficult rehab. I have had to confess and repent of the lies that I had believed about gay people as a whole.  It hasn't been easy or comfortable. but Oh, has it been worth it!

 I am living with a fully functioning heart! Joy and peace is restored and flowing  unencumbered.  I am finally free to embrace and love my daughter, her partner and all humanity with a love that chooses not to label anyone. For He, in His mercy, has not labeled me.   No longer living a half life, my spiritual heart blockage has been cleared.  Oh what a difference when our hearts work the way our Creator intended!

How about you?  Have you experienced a season where God needed to work on some issues in your own heart?  Is allowing Jesus to have access to your heart frightening to you? why or why not?  

Giving Our Children Wings

©PomPrint

The cheerful yellow flower lifts its face to the Sun. Life is good. Her seeds are secure and protected deep within the heart of the bud.  All is well.  Through Springtime storms or under clear, azure skies, her roots tangle with the soil of life and grow 

                down,

                           down, 

                                         down.

Taller now, the dandelion has witnessed seasons come and go as she stoically protects her seed.  Her roots grow deeper still with each passing day.

The dandelion stands strong and proud as time steals her remaining petals of youth.  But deep within the soil, her roots hold fast. The tenacious plant remains firm and secure against the storms of life as her seed matures within.

The days grow shorter and the dandelion's brilliant petals have given way to tiny mist-like parachutes each one connected to a seed destined for it's purpose. She has spent her life for this moment. Standing tall and deeply rooted, she whispers a final blessing and releases her seeds to the breath of their Creator.

Life in flight. The seedlings sail off to their destiny,  dancing upon Dandelion Winds.

John 3:8  Jesus said: “The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear it’s sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going. so it is with everyone born of the Spirit.”