Connecting With Others

©ludukecounseling

 I recently had dinner with an amazing young woman. Amy Rae is intelligent, compassionate, successful, beautiful, insightful, respectful, loving, serving, christian and gay. She and I have become friends because she was courageous enough to "enter the arena" and invite straight people and gay people to meet together to seek Jesus. I answered her meet-up group because this was exactly what I was seeking as well. Funny how God connects us.

She came with no agenda to "convince me" of my shortsightedness or judgmental spirit.  She did not shame me for my convictions.  I did not arrive with a list of scriptures to "convict her."  I didn't presume she wanted my prayers to "deliver her,"  Instead, we just met at a coffee shop with masks off and hearts open. We ate brownies, laughed and got to know each other as friends. The Holy Spirit took it from there.

I wonder why it seems so scary sometimes to simply dialogue with a stranger? Could it be that we often go not with the goal of simply getting to know another human being but we too often enter into dialogue with an agenda to push our own views at all costs. Sadly, I have done this. Though thankfully not with Amy Rae.

 As we talked over coffee, she shared that she had been seeking a faith community that looked more like "real lIfe". A blended community of straight people, gay people, young and old, rich and poor, sick and well, sinners and saints, black and white.  She had a vision of all of God's wildly different, imperfect, yet beloved children coming together to praise Him and learn from Him.  She had not found such a diverse gathering in the many churches she had visited so she sought to build it using the power of the internet and meet-up.com.  Smart girl.

 She was looking for the authentic body of Christ.  Can anyone relate? Those who are willing to set aside, but not hide, our individual opinions about homosexuality, politics, church doctrine and traditions. Amy was calling out to people who were willing to present themselves transparently. No posing, no excuses. I immediately caught her vision and wondered what such a community would be like. Can you imagine the freedom of people humbly sharing their stories and willing to listen wholeheartedly as others told theirs?  A funny thing happens when we stop talking and start listening...we find connecting points. We discover that we are more the same than different. 

 As we both dropped our masks, I am finding it easier to have the heart level conversations that shame  prevents us from engaging in. (Brene's definition of shame is the "fear of disconnection" ) Disconnection is a people pleasers worst nightmare.  

Amy Rae has challenged me to ask my questions and has been gracious to respond honestly and without judgement.   Wise beyond her years, she has been courageously authentic with me about her own wonderings and questions.  I cannot begin to tell you what a refreshing place this is!  

 We have found a deep respect and friendship and unconditional love as we look beyond our differences and connect in the things that truly matter.  We love Jesus. We are human, we acknowledge that we fall short of His glory. we admit that we don't know it all and that God is far bigger than we ever imagined or can wrap our heads around. We know that, apart from Christ, we have nothing...we are nothing.  We are sisters in Christ and are both "Daring Greatly"  to be ambassadors of reconciliation.  We have tapped into the power of empathy. The ability to understand and share the feelings of another.  Brene' Brown says this; "Empathy is the antidote to Shame"

I am honored to stand side by side with her in this arena of authenticity. We are keeping our sights on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith. He has not disappointed us.  

Amy Rae is another who helps me to "Dare Greatly".

The arena door stands open...will YOU step into the light?